Be a Romantic Hero! - Your Hero's Journey: Act 3 [Hero's journey]
We do it because it's worth it. A good life is its own reward.
The Hero struggles, suffers and sacrifices. In the end, if he does not give up, he will get his prize! This part of your journey is about obtaining and holding onto the prize, a fulfilling romantic relationship.
Your Romantic Hero's Journey has a happy ending. You can get everything you always wanted. Someone to hold and love you, children and happiness. You only need to finish what you started, complete your journey in Act 3.
The hero takes possession of the treasure won by facing death. There may be celebration, but there is also danger of losing the treasure again.
You have done the work, built up your SMV, found your spouse and become committed to each other for life. You celebrate your union in your marriage ceremony. This is not the end of your journey. It is the start of another phase. Now you will need to take steps to make sure that you don't lose what you have won with all of your hard work!
Getting married is a massive physical, mental and emotional adjustment. Everything from planning the wedding to moving in together can cause stress on your relationship. That stress has the potential to fracture your budding romance into a million pieces, destroying your happiness.
Issues to consider with you spouse: How much will you spend on your wedding? How will you organize household chores and finances? How will you divide all the other responsibilities? What potential stresses and changes will you face in the first year of marriage? What system of ethics, morality and negotiation will you employ to make decisions? Plan to deal with these issues together.
The Road Back
About three-fourths of the way through the story, the hero is driven to complete the adventure, leaving the Special World to be sure the treasure is brought home. Often a chase scene signals the urgency and danger of the mission.
Dating and courtship can be like a fantastic, exciting and happy journey into another world. But now, you are leaving that world and heading into world of domestic bliss. It's urgent to get your mind right and focus on your dedication and commitment to making your relationship work.
Things to think about: How well do you and your spouse know yourselves? Are you bringing into the relationship any trauma or immature mindsets and habits that will trip you up as you progress into your new life? What are you prepared to do about it?
The Final Death and Resurrection
At the grand climax, the hero is severely tested once more on the threshold of home. He or she is purified by a last sacrifice, another moment of death and rebirth, but on a higher and more complete level. By the hero’s action, the polarities that were in conflict at the beginning are finally resolved.
It seems that the moment you get engaged you may be hit with a thousand new opportunities for romance. Temptation is pulling at the last remnants of the single person you were. The stress of integrating two lives is pulling at you. Maybe some previously dormant issue in your life is being revealed by experiences.
Face your demons and slay your dragons. Now, you must once again let the man (or woman) you are die, burn away your old weaknesses and like a phoenix arise from the ashes a new man (or woman). Be reborn, better, stronger, united with your spouse. Become a new dual person, fully complete.
Things to consider: To get your spouse you were willing to invest time, energy, mental focus and money. What are you willing to invest to keep your spouse? Maintain and even build your SMV. Make time to really BE together. To be mentally, emotionally and physically intimate. Make the maintenance of your romantic relationship a priority in your life.
Return with the Treasure
The hero returns home or continues the journey, bearing a treasure that has the power to transform the world as the hero has been transformed.
Now that you have been transformed by the magic of love and romance, you can change the world. You and your spouse can now use your magic to improve the world by raising wonderful children.
Things to consider: The longer that you wait to have children the more difficult it will be. As you age fertility will diminish along with your energy to deal with the challenges of raising babies. Don't push your timing to the limit, have children as early as you possibly can.
Your Hero's Journey to find romantic love is over, your quest has been completed. Now new adventures await you, marriage, children and grandchildren. Your future is bright. Keep a record of how you and your spouse met, fell in love and decided to marry. Your children and grandchildren will be thrilled to hear the story that made their existence possible.
Next week: We will compare the roles of male and female heros.