We have lots of sentimental, subjective ideas about romantic relationships. That's to be expected since the very act of falling in love tends to shut off our objective reasoning in a sea of happy, horney hormones.
Coordinating the seeming randomness of falling in love is a series of powerful social technologies that we call the Sexual Marketplace. Describing them that way might sound cold even mechanistic, however by thinking of dating and courtship as technologies can have a very positive impact on our romantic lives.